I don’t suffer from night terrors, but
if I ever do, I hope I scream out,
Neely O’Hara! I could scream
this out while masturbating.
I’m masturbating for Mormons.
They can’t, so I do it for all of them.
Let the record state, I am not
a Mormon. It’s not that I’m against
religious freedom, just sexism,
racism, and homophobia. I could make up
some imaginary planets, but
I wouldn’t consider it holy.
I’m surprised I don’t have night terrors.
I have PTSD from when I had
is French for Old Man’s Disease.
You now owe me five dollars
for the French lesson.
Meg Johnson is the author of the books Inappropriate Sleepover (The National Poetry Review Press, 2014) and The Crimes of Clara Turlington (Vine Leaves Press, 2015). Her poetry has appeared in Hobart, Nashville Review, Painted Bride Quarterly, The Puritan, Sugar House Review, Verse Daily, and others. Her nonfiction has appeared in BUST, The Good Men Project, Ms. Magazine, and others. Meg started dancing at a young age and worked professionally in the performing arts for many years. She received her MFA from the NEOMFA Program and has taught writing at various colleges. She is the editor of Dressing Room Poetry Journal and has served as an external reviewer for University of Akron Press. She will be the writer-in-residence at Fairhope Center for the Writing Arts in August 2019. Visit her at: www.megjohnson.org